Friday, December 4, 2009


A friend, a dear friend actually, came to me with an idea. At first I thought it was just a ploy to get some free cookies and milk but this guy is serious. He wants to get in touch with the LOGO channel and get them to read my blog and see if there is a possibility of getting me my own show. I can just picture it now, a large ranch style kitchen so that I would have lots of storage space and room to move around in. And every good show has a side kick but I'm thinking of a new one every week, some cute little dressed in nothing but an apron so that I can chase him around the kitchen with a spatula while the food is cooking. And then what a guest list I could have! Ellen, Sir Ian, Kevin, and that adorable Neil Patrick Harris and the list just goes on. I'm hoping that he really does have friends over there but just in case, feel free to write, email or call LOGO (the LGBT Channel) and tell them that you think that I would should have my own show and that they can check out my blogs at their leisure, or better still, right now.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009


Dear Friends of the Stella, Sorry, I’ve been out of touch for awhile but I have been touring the south performing my job as a judge for all of the local Miss Gay America pageants. Every town, county or city that has a gay bar seems to be having these and I can use the bucks. The rules, of course, are somewhat different for these contests like sleeping with the judges is not only permitted but also encouraged. And although some of the contestants are truly pigs they are of the two-legged variety. Hog calling and chicken plucking are by themselves worthy attributes but can not be used during the talent portion of the contest. The rest of the rules seem to vary from bar to bar and local to local. The most interesting one was “The Miss Gay America Semi-Driver” competition. You just have to admire a truck driver walking in a pair of stilettos and who knew that latex girdles could be made that size. As always, any contestant caught grazing on the grass during the pageant will automatically be disqualified, except in Texas.

But in keeping with my reputation as The Kitchen Bitch, I will share a recipe that I have never before shared with anyone, my world famous chocolate chip cookies. You know I love short cuts and everyone will be sworn to secrecy on this one. I use the recipe on the back of the bag of Nestle’s Chocolate Chips with the following variation. To the batter add 1 tablespoon of instant coffee, 1 teaspoon of ground clove (not just for hams anymore), 1/2 cup of walnut pieces and a handful of flaked coconut (this keeps the cookies nice and moist for a longer period of time, like they're going to sit around). Then just finish with the rest of their directions except I like to make larger cookies (for when my diet says I can only have one cookie). Sometimes I like to add one additional ingredient and that would be 1 teaspoon of raspberry extract. I dare you.
Auntie Stella

Saturday, March 28, 2009


Dear Fans of the Stella; Sorry, got a bit distracted. Went to the corner Irish bar to order a bottle of their best Irish Whiskey they carry (McRotgut sells for $1.99 gallon) and ran into a pack of little men and started drinking with them. They claimed to be Leprechauns but I never did see a pot of gold and I do believe that they may be actually be Snow White's cast offs because one of them was really Dopey. And watch out if you drink Irish coffee! The coffee wires you up while the whiskey brings you down and the whipped cream gives you a rush, your poor body doesn't know what to do and mine did it all.

I have a recipe that I make every year on St. Patty's Day and at least one other time during the year. The meat takes about three hours to cook while the vegetables only need about 45 minutes or so which give you plenty of time to get the raw vegetables ready at your leisure.

Shopping: 1 corned beef brisket 3-5 pounds, 1 quart of beer, 1 shot of whiskey (tenders the roast even more), 1 tablespoon of caraway seeds, 3 tablespoons of Italian seasoning, 3 large bay leaves, 1 large sweet red onion sliced, 8 carrots skinned but left whole, 1 stalk of celery, 1 very large head of cabbage, 8-10 medium red potatoes.

In a lobster type pot, put the roast in the pot and cover with the whiskey and beer and add all seasonings and bring to a hard boil for 5 minutes uncovered then turn down to simmer. Add the onion to the pot. Cut the butt (or bottom if you prefer) of the celery off, cut into 4 pieces and rinse and add to the pot along with all of the leaves off of the stalk (what else are you going to use them for?) Now get lost for 2 hours. When you come back, rinse the potatoes and cut out any big eyes or bad spots, trim off about 8 more large trimmed pieces of celery and add all of these to the pot and re-cover the pot. Peel the outside leaves off the cabbage and cut into 8 wedges and add to the top of the pot. If your liquid has boiled down you can add water or more beer. The alcohol all cooks off so not to worry about serving to children or people in AA. (Lots of people don't consider it a meal if there is no bread, I make Jiffy cornbread with an extra tablespoon of sugar per box or you could make biscuits or just bread and butter.)
Dig to the bottom of the pot and pull the roast out and re-cover the veggies. Let the meat cool down for about 15 minutes and then slice thin slices and then serve the meal on plates or deep bowls with mustard on the side or right on the beef and cabbage. The meal will be colorful and delicious and leftover meat can be used for sandwiches (if there is any). Next day, cut up any leftover veggies and add a can of corned beef and make it soup. Waste not.

Sunday, February 1, 2009


I have a friend at Sweetbay, a local grocery store that also sell alcohol (not the kind that you rub all over you (although that could be fun too, I used to do belly button shots but that is another story for another day). Anyway, I told her about a recipe that I use to make pate, cheap easy and oh so good but I never wrote it down for her so here you go pretty lady.

What you need to buy: 1 package of chicken livers (about a pound or so); 1 8oz package of cream cheese; 2 shots of Cuantro (sp? the orange liquor 1 for the pate and 1 for me) or 2 or 3 tablespoons of orange juice concentrate for the non drinkers and a pinch of basil, and some ground walnuts or pecans.

Boil the chicken livers (blood and all), add the basil while cooking and pull the cream cheese out of the fridge to bring it to room temperature. When the livers are done and the cream cheese is soft, throw both into a blender and add booze or oj concentrate and puree. The mixture will be kind of wet when it comes out so put it in a container and stick in the fridge for a couple of hours or until mold able. Shape into a log or a ball and cover with the crushed nuts and put on a plate with your favorite crackers. This is the basic recipe, if you want to make it your own by adding onion salt, garlic salt or whatever the second time it is up to you, my job is just to inspire, hope I've done that.

Valentines day is coming up and for that I suggest making reservations somewhere nice so that you don't have to clean up the kitchen and have more time for romance!

Auntie Stella signing out.

Thursday, January 15, 2009


Chili can be made so many different ways and with so many different kinds of meats or no meat at all. Again, I prefer to use the dried beans and just let them soak overnight then rinse in the morning canned beans have more salt then you probably want in your diet anyway and again they are also cheaper on the budget.

For vegetarian or just a meatless meal, try adding a bag of frozen Italian vegetables instead. I do use canned chillies and I do use the mild variety. Old El Paso is my favorite brand. Chili powder is one of those spices that can bite you in the butt if you add too much too soon. The heat and other ingredients help it to release it's power so watch out. My mother always made chili with hamburger and for years I did too. Then I got to thinking about the men on the cattle drives, did they really grind the meat first???? Doubtful so I sometimes make what I call Chuck Wagon Chili and it is a favorite with my friends. Again you don't have to use stew beef which is usually higher in price than say a large round steak or a roast that you can get on sale. I put about a teaspoon of olive oil is a fry pan and then throw the beef in and stir it around until the meat changes color then add it to the chili. Turkey has a tendency to pick up the taste of what ever spices it is cooked with so you might just pick up a turkey breast on sale (it goes on sale and you can just cut off what you need for the chili and bake the rest. And then again, we can go back to those boiled chicken thighs and tap into them again. Mexico does have a lot of chickens, don't you think they thought about this first?? If you don't have the time or talent that it takes to open a box of Jiffy corn meal and muffin mix or you just want to try something different, why not try serving your chili with tostitos and make everyone think that you are treating them to a real treat. Gather up the points while you can.

If you live alone and/or have no friends that you can share meals with, most of what I talk about can be frozen and then thawed for a quick meal in the microwave. So, what new excuses are you going to give me? Get cooking with the old broad here who used to have a catering business back in Washington, D.C. about 20 years ago, when I was 9, LOL.

Eat and enjoy,
Auntie Stella


If you don't have a crock p0t, now would be a great time to invest in one. They are easy to use and you can get them with the lift out container which is easier to clean and you can get everything ready the night before an just stick it in the fridge until you are ready to leave for the day and come home to the aroma of beef or chicken stew or soup. The supermarkets are full of bags of vegetables that will fit your needs or you can use canned veggies (my choice) and packages of the kitchen wonder drug MTB broth. Yes, something better that bullion cubes has come along but I still prefer to use my chicken stock when I can but the beef is out of this world. I get three packets for around a buck and it's worth every penny because I also use it in my Bloody Mary mix, voted the best in Washington, D.C. three years in a row.

In your crock pot, put two packages of the beef broth in the bottom of the pot, throw in a package of stew beef (or if steak or beef roast is on sale buy it and cut it into stew beef size pieces) and toss it in the pot. Open 2 cans of potatoes; 1 of whole kernel corn; 2 cans of green beans; and one of carrots and pour them into the pot. If you have a cup of coffee left over from breakfast add that and then throw in a sliced onion and maybe a piece of celery chopped and you are done. Yes, you do add the water from the veggies until you are about an inch from the top. Turn the crock pot on low before you leave the house (leave yourself a note on the front door). You can also make sandwiches if you want but the soup with some "dipping bread and butter" might be enough. For stew, leave out the corn and to thicken the soup into stew, you can fuss with flour or corn starch or do what Auntie Stella does and add some instant mashed potatoes when you get home. (Who knew!!! HE, HE I did) The bags of frozen veggies work great too but let them thaw in the fridge over night before putting them in the crock pot. You and your families can come home and dinner is all but done and the whole house smells great.

Next we're on to chili,


Now is the perfect time for this category when my friends outside of Florida (and it's cold here too) as they are freezing their butts off. Some of you are probably like me and after a dinner you take the left over veggies to the kitchen and put them in bowls and put in the fridge until they are unidentifiable before throwing out (or) eating them so that you don't waste food. Well, I have a new idea for you that isn't actually new, just forgotten. Save those veggies in a large container that will fit in your freezer and just keep adding them until you are ready to make soup. It can be thawed in the fridge overnight or just throw them into a pot or crock pot and you have a soup base. When I cut a fresh onion I always cut off both ends and throw them in the bowl as well to help season the soup. Do you buy fresh celery? Cut off the leaves and slice the celery at the base and clean it up and chop it into smaller pieces and freeze that as well for seasoning. These are simple things that you can do to make a great pot of soup.

When I make chicken soup of any kind, I buy the large package of chicken thighs when they are on sale and cook the whole batch at once. Chicken thighs are not only cheap but they only have one bone and it's large enough that I can even find it without my glasses. I spice it up with onion, celery (seed or real); caraway seed (yep, the stuff that makes rye bread); dill weed while it's boiling. Once it's done you can just pull the thighs out, remove the bone and the skin (throw the skin back into the pot to boost your chicken stock) and just shred the thigh meat or dice it if you prefer. For those of you who keep telling me that you don't have time or can't cook, you can just put the thighs in the fridge or in the freezer until you are ready to make your soup. Homemade chicken and noodle soup, chicken and rice soup or chicken and vegetable. Beware though, when your family tastes these home made treats they will want more.

Many people say that I cheat when cooking but I prefer to think of it as cooking smarter and taking easier routes. Dry beans are much cheaper than canned and are actually very easy to do, trust me. I recently made a pot of split pea soup, a large pot actually and there were only 3 of us eating it and it was gone in one night. I soaked 2 packages of dry split peas (88 cents a bag) over night with 2-3 inches of water above the peas. Next morning I drained and rinsed them twice and put the same amount of water over them again. Threw in a slab of ham (you don't have to buy the whole ham but you can get a lot of meals out of one) diced into pieces about the size of dimes or pennies, and just boiled the hell out of them for about 1/2 hour. Removed from the heat and scooped out the peas that were still a little hard and threw them into the blender and hit the puree button and then returned them to the pot. Poured in a can of diced potatoes drained and a can of diced carrots drained of course and brought the mixture back to a boil. Slowly added a pint of half and half and it was done and ready to serve. Served with heat and serve rolls and butter.

I think that's about all I can get on one blog so I'll continue in minutes with part 2.

Friday, January 9, 2009


Years ago when I lived in D.C., close friends and I used to do progressive meals, soup at one house, salad at the next and so on and on holidays like Christmas and New Year's it was an all day event starting with breakfast at my place. My special breakfast doesn't have to be for a whole tribe of people, it can just be a special breakfast for that special person in your life for Valentines Day or maybe a birthday or anniversary.

The day before, cut up cantaloupe and honey dew melon in bite size pieces and rinse a pint of strawberries and cover and store in the fridge overnight. For breakfast you will need, two large eggs for each person; 1 piece of wheat toast for every 4 eggs, two pieces of raisin toast (preferably cinnamon raisin); one piece of uncooked bacon for each egg; one tablespoon of Chili Sauce (find in ketchup section) per egg and chopped black olives for decoration and a muffin tin. Also 2 cups of 10x sugar; 1 tablespoon of butter (or oleo) and 2 tablespoons of rum or 1 tablespoon of rum extract. Bacon or sausage for each person. I know this sounds like a lot but it's a no brainer. If I can do it New Year's morning hung over anyone should be able to do it.

First ting you do is take a hit off the rum bottle for courage. In the muffin tin, cut circles of wheat toast to place in the bottoms. Add chili sauce on top of toast and line the muffin tin with the uncooked bacon. Put the egg on top of the chili sauce and the olives on top of the egg and pop into the oven at 350 degrees for 35-45 minutes or until a tooth pick will stand in the egg. Next fry the sausage or bacon to be served and let drain on paper towels to absorb the grease. Add the butter and rum to the powered sugar (10x) and beat by hand until you get a consistency of a drip. Put the eggs and breakfast meat on the plate then drizzle raisin toast with sugar/rum and add fruit and drizzle it with the same. You probably will need another shot of the rum to clean the kitchen but the praise will be worth it.
Auntie Stella